Checking in

Hello from Park City! I have to say, I do think there's something to that study from a few months ago that people have reduced appetites at higher altitudes. Between noon and 10 pm yesterday, I had not a single thing to eat. Not by design, just the usual madness of Day One of vacation - the flight, the drive, the grocery store, the unpacking, getting the kids fed and settled in bed. I was so tired I had some Doritos Munchies Mix and went to bed.

Today I had a Zone bar for breakfast, lots of water, some turkey, mozzarella and tomato for lunch and fish tacos without the tortilla for dinner. Almost no snacking, which is virtually unheard-of for me.

My parents and I took my two sons and my nephew (ages practically 5, 6, 7 and three quarters) to the Utah Olympic Park to check out the site of some of the winter Olympic games in 2002. The best part was definitely the freestyle ski jumping exhibition - the jumpers climb up huge ramps and then fly off into a swimming pool. There's a whole viewing area, and every time a jumper went a little further up the ramp the crowd would chant, "High-er, high-er, high-er," and then scream and clap as the jumper came hurtling down. Lotta peer pressure there.

We took the boys to dinner on Main Street, then let them run at full speed uphill after they finished their ice cream. Which turned out not to be the best idea, since my oldest threw up within 20 minutes of arriving back at the house. Sigh. Clorox Cleanup is my friend.

Up in the Clouds

The boys and I are midflight on our way to meet my parents and nephew in Utah for a week of hiking and exploring.

No seatback TVs on this flight, alas, but they do have WiFI so at least I can plug the boys into Hulu.com if things get desperate. There's a family behind us with a 15-month-old who is utterly miserable, kicking and screaming and having a conniption because she has to sit still for so long. I feel terrible for the parents, I know that stress well. It does make me glad I left the baby home with the Hubs, and it assuages my guilt a little bit.

The scale was down a little again this morning, to 212.2. I don't think the house we're staying in has a scale, so that may have to be my weigh-in challenge weight. We'll see.

I think the scale movement is at least a little because I've cut way back on wine. Bummer. I'll always have weekends...

The immediate challenge for me is to not eat my way through this flight. I tend to snack incessantly on planes. I'll let you know how it goes...

Weigh-In

Finally, the scale is moving! 213.2 this morning, thanks to leaving my cousin's grad party yesterday before dessert and arriving at last night's 50th birthday part after appetizers and missing the cake too.

Hallelujah!

MAGIC MIRROR!!

I was in Target today with my boys and glanced over at my reflection in a mirror. It was miraculous! I had grown a good five inches and dropped another 50 pounds! I looked AWESOME. So much so that I had to take a photo to show you.

It was a pleasure to see that hot version of myself, and kudos to Target for making everyone feel better-looking in Target merch. For comparison purposes, I had my 7-year-old snap a picture of reality. Please excuse the wet hair.

The differences are subtle, but boy do they add up.

In other news, I was down a pound today. Fingers crossed for weigh-in tomorrow. NSV: I wore heels tonight without feeling that my feet might explode.

Does This Happen to You?

I've had this problem for a couple years now: I get lots of tiny holes in my shirts, right where the shirts hit the button and zipper on my pants. I assume this is because my belly is so freakin' big (and it never did this before, so I may have some leeway to blame it on pregnancies). I WANT IT TO STOP. Perfectly good shirts have been ruined by this, and it's irritating. Plus, my 4-year-old is always saying, "Mom, why does your shirt have holes?" because it's right at eye level for him.

Anyone else run into this? It's better if I wear a camisole under my shirt, but it's summer and I'm not interested in layering.

We're road-tripping tonight and tomorrow to see family in PA and NJ, then rushing home tomorrow night for my husband's partner's 50th birthday party. I'm sure I'll be a barrel of laughs by the time we hit that shindig. However, the guy is a total wine lover, so I imagine the wine calories I've been saving all week will be well spent there.

The scale this morning showed 216.4. Not a lot of movement going on here. I don't think I need a fill because I'm really tight in the morning and at lunchtime I'm still not able to eat a whole lot of solids (hence the black bean soup I have most days). I haven't eaten steak since before my surgery, I've had hamburger meat a couple of times when it's really crumbled, and I occasionally have chicken salad, although that hasn't gone down smoothly all the time.

I'm getting a little more into exercise and trying to drink more, which is easier in the summer anyway. Trying to ditch calories from alcohol because they're unnecessary. I'm probably snacking too much, and I haven't given up chocolate.

Any suggestions?

ZOOOOOOOMBA

So I finally got around to taking a zumba class today. I can't dance for shit so I checked with the instructor ahead of time because it was held at a dance studio. She assured me I didn't need experience, and she was right. So were all of you guys: It was SO MUCH FUN. Small class, just five of us and the instructor. I loved it, I really did enjoy it enough that I didn't feel like I was working too hard. My right foot and right knee felt it, though, so I'll have to be careful. But I will definitely go back.

I am (mostly) over my snit about the tight band and PB yesterday. Thanks for the sympathy and compassion. I had a Zone bar for breakfast and some soup for lunch and all is going down fine. I'm having an artichoke tonight, come hell or high water, so I'm being really careful before then. We're supposed to be having Chinese at my mother-in-law's house tonight because some cousins are visiting from Houston, but I'm planning to have a little soup and wait till I get home to enjoy my delectable artichoke.

I just finished a great book, The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance by Elna Baker. It's a memoir by a formerly fat Mormon girl who's trying to launch a performing career and find the love of her life while remaining a virgin in New York City. It was great, partly because I moved to New York after losing a boatload of weight and some of our experiences were similar (minus the preserving virginity part). The books spends a lot of time talking about how Elna's life changed as she lost weight, how the world treated her differently and changed the way she saw other people. Anyway, I totally enjoyed it and wanted to pass it on.

Public Service Announcement (For Women Only)

It's been said before but I'll say it again: My band is tighter during my period. For some reason, I forget that every month and then - BAM! - have some unpleasantness.

Off to warm up my soup...

Perspective

Well, hi there. Yes, I know I'm still on the left (GAINED) side of the Summer Meltdown Challenge weight-loss graph, thanks for the reminder. My period is due any day and I'm sure that will be followed by a precipitous drop. For sure.

We had the Hubs' extended family here yesterday for Father's Day brunch, which was fun. For the first time in a while, it really bothered me that I couldn't eat a bagel. I really, really would have liked one.

Later, we were sitting outside and the kids were playing and my husband looked at me and said, "This is the life. Our children are healthy, we're healthy and all four of our parents are healthy. We will look back on these days as the best we ever had." He's totally right. It doesn't get better than this. That reminder put missing out on a bagel into pretty good perspective for me.

Meltdown Update

Well, a few days ago I said I was going to stick with my old scale during the challenge but I think I'm going to reverse that decision and use the new scale.

1. There is a discrepancy between old and new scales (this morning 215 old/ 216.4 new) but it's not in my favor so I won't be cheating for the challenge.
2. I really like having a more accurate and precise reading. Old scale goes in half-pound increments; new scale goes in two-tenths of a pound.
3. I've been waiting to transition to a new scale, waiting to find a time when I wouldn't be mentally anguished by "giving up" a pound or two in exchange for more accuracy. I'm there now - going "up" to 216 doesn't bug me. Much.

I hope you've all had a good Father's Day. I've been thinking especially of Jacquie and her family today, and sending my warmest wishes to all of you.

Melting Before My Eyes

On the heels of the horrid stuck/vomiting episode on Wednesday, yesterday the Hubs and I finally caught the kids' stomach virus. By the end of the day I had a few saltines, a package of Cup O'Soup and a glass of flat Coke. My surgeon doesn't do the anti-nausea meds, apparently, but "prescribed" the Coke. Super.

The good news is, I weighed in this morning at 214.6. Yay for that. Feeling much better today, although not entirely back to normal.

Have a good weekend, everyone. I'm taking my little men to see Toy Story 3 this afternoon. I love me some Buzz Lightyear.

DISASTER

I am so embarrassed to even post this, after my rah-rah, I'm going to the gym posts, this morning and yesterday. I considered just slinking away for a few days till my next gym appointment on Friday, but decided to come clean.

I grabbed some tortilla chips and some American cheese on my way out the door to the gym, and had a **horrible** stuck and throwing up episode. As in, into a plastic bag while I drove, pulled over for more, finally got to the gym and went inside, only to turn around and get outside to do it alll over again in the car. And then again at home.

F-ing nightmare. All I said to the trainer was that I had gotten sick. I said I'd be back for my Friday appointment.

Last night I had a bad stuck episode (no vomiting) and I guess I was still swollen. Didn't take the all-liquids rule to heart today.

My throat has been on fire. Just sat down with some soup now. 24 more hours of liquids.

So no gym today. Mortifying.

PHOTOS!

I've got two pictures for you - one "during" shot and one "before" shot. Both taken on the same day.

Hmmm. Sounds like a case for Encyclopedia Brown, no?

This is my during weight loss photo. Please note my hair remains in a ponytail because I HATE doing my hair. If someone gave me money for a completely frivolous expenditure and forbade me from using it for anything useful to myself or others, I would totally have someone come to my house every morning and blow my hair out for me.

Here's me, 50 pounds down:

Can you believe how short my legs are? I mention it every time, I know. But it never ceases to amaze me. It's like God doesn't love me or something.

BUT! NSV: Those white pants are pants I bought in 2007 after my sister's wedding. I took them to be hemmed and by the time I picked them up from the tailor, I already couldn't wear them anymore. Yesterday, I put them on, and with thanks and praise to almighty Spanx, they fit.

And here's the before shot, of the aforementioned criminally awful upper arms:

I know, right? I know. The good news is, any improvement will be major. At noon I will have a heart-to-heart with my trainer and tell him that even though I *look* like a person who could use a whole-body makeover, what I really want to focus on is getting Michelle Obama arms.

Well, I Done Did It.

I made a gym appointment. Tomorrow, 12 noon. Haven't been there since late last summer. But my friend sent me some pictures from her wedding, and my upper arms should be outlawed. For serious.

In other news, the scale is inching back to where my ticker is, ever so slowly.

I Like to Think It's My Independent Spirit Shining Through (Also: Sushi Question)

The fact that I gained weight the first week of the challenge, I mean. I'd hate to go along with the crowd and lose a shitton of weight in a single week, so I ate like a heifer and here I am, two point five pounds heavier than last Sunday. You're welcome.

Actually, this morning the scale read 218, so I managed to shed half a pound overnight. Yee-haw. I got a new scale last week and its readings are very close to current (old) scale. But I'm keeping old scale at least through the end of this challenge so I'm consistent from week to week, and I'm using the old scale for my official Sunday weigh-in reports to Kristen.

We were away for the weekend, back to Delaware and Pennsylvania (it never seems to be anywhere glamorous like Southampton or Nantucket) for my aunt's 70th birthday party. Middle son got a stomach virus on Friday night so I left him home with the Hubs and took older son and baby. Baby threw up all over her pretty party dress 10 minutes before we arrived and then was miserable from, I assume, the same stomach bug that felled her brother. Oy.

So I ate party food on Thursday and Saturday, and then snacked on Jordan candied almonds on the lonnnggg drive home yesterday. Not great.

Today I am back to my "normal" routine, which I hope will translate to a downward trend on the scale. Also planning to spend more time commenting on blogs. The typing keeps my fingers busy, so I can't snack. ;)

On to the Sushi Question: When you eat it, do you cut it up? I can't imagine taking the whole thing in one bite with a band. Walk me through this, please...

The Scale Is Not My Friend

Last night's cocktail party went well, we had about 60 people - all new families to my kids' nursery school for next year, plus some board members and the school director. I swear, it felt like every mom in this town is an Amazon woman. And they wear really high heels. I was easily the shortest and outweighed every other woman in the joint by 60 pounds, minimum.

However, I didn't spend much time worrying about it. Everyone was friendly and mixed well; I think they were pretty happy to meet other parents. Wine never hurts either.

My mom was here, and that woman worked like crazy. So many people came up to me to say, "Wow, your mom is amazing." She totally is, I owe her a massage or something. At least a mani/pedi.

The scale is completely betraying me these days. I've been busy gardening and cleaning for the party all week and haven't had time to eat much so I don't know exactly what's going on. I'll keep drinking water and hope the scale starts sliding the right way soon.

I've been reading your blogs but for the most part haven't had a chance to comment. Doesn't mean I'm not keeping up with you, though. Have a great weekend, ladies. xoxo

The %^&%ing scale was up 3.5 pounds this morning. But I'm sure that's water weight. Well, maybe not all of it.

Anyway, onward and downward. I was so busy today planting flowers and getting things ready for Thursday's cocktail party that I didn't have time to graze or snack much.

My mom is coming tomorrow to help with party preparations and hang out with us till Saturday. It's especially nice to have her here since the Hubs isn't home till Thursday.

I had an artichoke (of course) for dinner with 1/2 cup of the leftover chicken salad. It got dry overnight so I had to add more Greek yogurt, and Nicole said the same thing happened to her. But with more yogurt it was really great. Lots of good flavor, and it went down easily.

Now I'm finishing my glass of wine and going to bed. Here's hoping my scale will be kinder tomorrow morning.

It's Monday

I don't have too much exciting to report: Snacked and grazed and snacked through yesterday, woke up during the night with that godawful ovulation pinch, had a better eating day today. I'm currently enjoying some chicken salad courtesy of Nicole's awesome recipe (I used chives instead of green onion; still delish).

Scale was up today, not stressing too much about it. Bought a ton of flowers to plant and got about half of the planting done, I'll finish tomorrow. The Hubs is traveling most of the week, my mom comes to visit on Wednesday. Preparations for the nursery school cocktail party are well under way. All I need is good weather and we're all set.

Thanks to all of you for your great comments and warm wishes on my 50-pound milestone. I've said it before and I'll say it again: All of you have given me so much support and advice on this journey, I would never have made it this far without you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

PS Should I be concerned that my 4-year-old is obsessed with Michael Jackson, the Village People and Lady Gaga?

Thoughts at 50 Down

Fifty pounds ago I had a lot of aches and pains. My feet hurt every time I stood up and I walked funny because I was so stiff. I snored a lot, sending my husband to the guest room more often than either of us liked. I was tired and irritable and depressed and despairing.

Today I feel like I'm on my way. Popping up from a sitting position is easier, moving is easier, I'm not nearly as tired as I was and my snoring is almost gone. I'm a lot more comfortable when I go out in public, and I feel better when I'm socializing. My spirit feels lighter now, and I'm looking forward to doing things with my kids this summer rather than dwelling on the things I can't do because of my weight. That's a great, great change.

I just did the math and I'm averaging a 1.7 pound loss every week. Not setting any records with my pace but I'm OK with slow and steady. I don't feel deprived, I don't feel like I'm making any big sacrifices. I eat, I'm satisfied, I'm losing weight.

I could probably use a tiny fill. I'm at 5.5 cc's in a 10cc band. 5.75 was too much, I had to have some taken out because I wasn't losing weight and was all kinds of uncomfortable. Wonder if my surgeon would do 5.6 cc's, just adding 0.1 cc's?

The Hot Summer Meltdown Challenge starts today, which will be a great motivator to keep my A-game through the summer.

I still need to exercise consistently and start weight training to firm up the flab. But I'm grateful for where I am; the road ahead doesn't look as long or as daunting as it did 50 pounds ago.

FIFTY! 50!! FIFTY!

I hit fifty pounds down today, five months and one day after surgery. I'm happy and excited, but also mindful that there is still a long way to go. Fifty pounds less than before, though.

Note: I lost 13 of those pounds before surgery, so I haven't lost 50 in five months. I think it's important to let people know that, particularly if you're considering surgery or just got your band.

I think I may have lost that last pound from sheer stress. I made salmon and scallops provencal last night for my in-laws, which went well despite losing power at 3.45 pm and then having it go on and off intermittently for the next couple of hours. I did what I could on the gas cooktop with the side dishes and we ended up grilling the salmon since the oven was a no-go.

After about 5.30 pm, the power was just off, no flashes back on. So it got hot and then my 7-year-old started throwing up. I spent the rest of the evening doing dishes by candlelight and cleaning puke out of three bathrooms (clorox is my friend), one bedroom rug and a couch by flashlight.

Power came back on sometime after 1 am, so this morning I whipped the Magic Machine into action:

Do you have one of these? They. Are. Awesome. The Bissell Little Green is a lifesaver, particularly with small children who tend to vomit without regard for upholstered furniture or bedroom carpeting.

That's the latest. I'm not sure what kind of curse we've got going on with our utilities, we've lost power a lot lately and had a water main break that shut down the street for 12 hours last Friday. Plus, the boiler went, a water pressurizer blew up in the basement and the upstairs air conditioning went on the fritz a couple weeks ago.

Please send good utility karma to me this week. I'll need it.

I Did It! I Exercised!

The thunderstorms everyone was calling for never materialized, so I managed to squeeze in 30 minutes of laps in the pool this afternoon. I am so out of shape that I could only do breast stroke, with the occasional freestyle added in. Lame much? Anyway, I did it. Go me.

Thanks for the party suggestions. The board members are bringing wine, so we should have at least 10 bottles and I'll have five or six on hand to keep things moving along. So nerve-wracking, this party throwing thing. I've never once hosted a cocktail party. Ridiculous, right? We have a party once a year, and it's catered by Planet Pizza. That's the level of entertaining we usually do.

Gilly posted a completely awesome recipe for a quinoa summer salad. I made it yesterday and it's delicious. You can throw anything in this salad and it's great. I used fresh mozzarella and added some chopped cucumber and red onion. So good. Try it.

It's been a crazy day. I'm still reeling from Tipper and Al's breakup, and now we've lost another Golden Girl. Jeesh.

Water, water everywhere

Damn water. Scale was up 2.5 pounds from yesterday. Damn damn damn. So today I drink and drink and drink. Oh, it'll come off. Just watch.

In other news, I need to start swimming. Or walking. Something. I am astonished by how f-ing lazy I am. Truly. It's embarrassing.

Stressful end of the school year stuff happening here. I need to buy teacher gifts. I'm hosting a nursery school "new families" cocktail party for 60 next week. (WTF was I thinking? Had no idea there were that many new families. It's a small school.) Lots of gardening and landscaping needs to be done by then. Oy.

Is anyone out there a party planner? How much wine do I need for 60 adults? Please God let the weather be OK so some of this can be outside. Helllllpppppp.

Forty-Nine!

Fifty is soooooo close.

One Minivan, Two Kids, Seven States

Home at last! I drove through seven states with my 4-year-old and one-year-old, stopping along the way to visit family. (The Hubs stayed home so the oldest child could march in the parade with his Cub Scout pack.)

We ended up at my brother's house in Virginia for a combination Memorial Day/my niece's 4th birthday party. It's a six-hour drive that requires me to go through the Bronx, over the George Washington Bridge, the entire length of the New Jersey turnpike, I-95 and the Washington Beltway. Kinda stressful driving.

I passed the time listening to audiobooks on my iPod while my son watched Kipper and the baby slept. I'm late in the game on this one, but Malcolm Gladwell's "Outliers" is fascinating, particularly from the perspective of a parent with young children. He debunks the idea that some people are naturally gifted, and shows how a combination of circumstances, luck and hard work is responsible for success. Really thought-provoking.

Then I listened to "Sh*t My Dad Says," by Justin Halpern and could not stop laughing. It's hysterical, as long as you don't mind an f-bomb every other word. My son kept asking why I was laughing and why he couldn't listen to it.

Confession time: I ate horribly this weekend. There was a lot of good food, and I partook. Nothing band-unfriendly, because who wants to hog the bathroom sliming and throwing up during a party. But there was cake. And a cookie or two. And dips and all kinds of stuff. But still, it didn't hold a candle to what I would have eaten pre-band.

The scale has not yet registered my poor eating - I weighed in at 218.5 today, just a half pound above my lowest. I'm expecting a bounce or three this week, but I want to start losing again. NOW.

Thanks for all your comments on the relationships post. It's something to think about. Our weight loss affects the people closest to us, mostly for the better but sometimes in ways we don't expect. I was happy to hear your thoughts.