Waiting for surgery day

My surgery is scheduled for January 4th. I am supposed to try to lose some weight before then, so my liver will be smaller for the surgery (the surgeon has to move the liver to get to the stomach). This isn't entirely easy with Christmas around the corner, but it hasn't been as bad as I feared. This morning I weighed 256.5, 10 pounds lower than my highest weight.

I am Slim-Fasting for breakfast, trying to avoid too much bread and snacking.

I've been spending a lot of time reading blogs and watching YouTube videos of people documenting their experiences and weight loss with the band. It's interesting - I am by nature a pessimist. But I have never felt more hopeful about the possibilities ahead than I do now. I am SO READY for this, so ready to feel better and have more energy and look better and shop in regular stores and not feel awkward and self-conscious all the time.

New Year's Day marks the start of a new decade. My life on the cusp of 2000 was wildly different than it is now -- I was a single journalist living in New York City and had just started dating the guy who would be my husband. I was almost 100 pounds thinner, running regularly. The Sept. 11 terrorist attacks hadn't happened yet. It was a different world.

Most of this decade has been devoted to building our family. My husband and I married in 2001 and had our first son 10 months later. Talk about the shock of a lifetime! Motherhood wasn't a smooth or easy transition for me, but now I am in it whole hog. And there's nowhere else I'd rather be.

We have three children now, all blessedly healthy. I am ready to nurture myself so that I can continue to nurture them.