My band is a bit tighter the last couple of days, not too tight but enough to really force me to slow down when I'm eating. I can still eat the good stuff (solid protein), and I'm not heading off to snarf ice cream, so I don't think I'm too tight.
Yesterday morning I was really upset, like crying upset. My first instinct was to go to a restaurant for a solo lunch, which I often did preband but haven't done nearly as much in the last 10 months. Because it's not so much fun when you can hardly eat anything you've ordered. On the way to the restaurant, I had a mental argument with myself. I knew that what I really should do was go home, have a light lunch and then go for a walk or jog to help me feel better.
Buuuut the lunch won out. After I'd eaten about five bites of the spinach dip I ordered, I was completely full. No way anything else was going down, and in fact I was uncomfortable. I asked for a container to take the rest home.
You guys, I was so pissed. It's not healthy to indulge emotional eating, and I know that (and I do realize that's the entire point of the band), but by God it really can be soothing when you need it.
This wasn't the first post-surgery hankering for emotional eating, and I know it won't be the last. But once I got over being pissed that my usual go-to mechanism wasn't going to work, I was so relieved that I didn't have to feel guilty for overeating again, for hoovering a jillion calories in one sitting and being sick to my stomach for the rest of the day.
At home I pulled it together enough to throw away the leftovers. This morning I went for a 30-minute walk/run; it's been forever since I did that, and I really need to get started if I'm going to shoot for this half-marathon on March 20. I did day 1 of the Couch to 5K workout, and my legs were fatigued embarrassingly early. I attribute that to the hills in my neighborhood, but it's probably just because I have the fitness level of a gnat right now. You gotta start somewhere, right?
