"I'm Up, I'm Down, I'm Fat, I'm Thin"

Is anyone here old enough to remember that line from St. Elmo's Fire? The rich girl's mom - the one who whispers every time she says the word cancer - mentions it resignedly at the family dinnertable.

The line has stuck with me all these years, because it completely applied to my experience with my weight. Although in the last 10 years I can't say there have been more than a few months where I felt "thin." And by that I mean weighing less than 200 pounds. This morning I weighed 209.6, up from a low of 206.8 the other day.

I'd love to be out of the 200s by Labor Day, but I don't see it happening. I'd *really* love to be out of the 200s by the time I land in Chicago, and maybe that's a good goal to set. I'm on the slower side in my losing, mostly because I'm lazy and have slipped a bit from my model bandster ways. It's not a mystery to me why I'm not going gangbusters with this thing.

So I'm setting my goal: I have five weeks to lose either nine pounds or 6.8 pounds. That's a tall order given my recent patterns. But it's a good, solid goal.

I'm due for a small fill, scheduled on Sept. 1st. So maybe this is do-able.

Where's the Progress?

Today was a hungry day. I ate a lot. Bad choices. I need a tweak when I see my surgeon after Labor Day. No real workout, but I walked a little bit because I took the boys to see the King Tut exhibit in Times Square.

(Side note: I've spent more time in Times Square in the last year than I did in the entire three years I lived in New York. People who live in New York don't go to Times Square unless they're passing through on their way to the theater district or on the way to work. It really is ridiculously crowded there. So much so that I tucked a note with my cellphone number in each kid's pocket just in case I lost one of them.)

Here they are, watching the madness of Times Square from the (relative) serenity of the Broadway Lounge.

I am sooooo close to 60 down and my halfway point. Gilly, who was banded around the same time I was, is at 90 down. (YAY GILLY, you skinny bitch.) And you guys, she is *never* going to let me live it down that she is kicking.my.ass. Ugh.

It's All About the Portions

Isn't that just the truth? And the truth is, I'm not doing so great on portion control. My band is doing some of it, but the 'Kristin' part still needs, ahem, a lot of work.

I use small plates, try to put my fork down between bites and chew, chew, chew. I don't drink with meals except for when I have wine with dinner. I generally avoid slider foods. But limiting how much I put on my (much smaller) plate is something I'm still working on.

I keep reminding myself that it's not about how much I can shove in, it's about how little I can eat and still feel satisfied.

It's an ongoing process.

Getting Closer...

Thanks for the encouragement in my last whiny post. You were right, the scale showed a delayed drop, and as of this morning I am down 59.2 pounds, less than a pound from 60 and just 1.3 pounds from my halfway point to goal!

Barbara, I hope you and your husband had a great time in downtown Philly. KoP was as magical as I remembered it. {For the uninitiated, KoP is the King of Prussia Mall, which is nice and bright and huge and has every store I could ever want to shop in.} I could move right in to that place and stay there for a lonnnngggg time before I got bored. We mostly walked around because you can't do any serious shopping with a baby in tow, but it was fun to get out with my sister and get a little walking in.

I think my goal gift to myself will be a kids-free shopping trip to KoP.

Can you believe how close we are to Chicago? It seemed like ages and ages when the idea first popped up.

It Moved. A Little.

The scale moved a bit, although just by a few ounces. Whatever, I'll take it.

We've been doing a ton of driving, and my tailbone is KILLING me. I get out of the car looking like I'm bent in half. Very elegant.

I went to dinner tonight with my parents and sister for my dad's 62nd birthday. I had some bisque - not a great choice, but it was crab and artichoke. You understand. Then I had the scallop entree. I ate two of them and gave the rest away and was absolutely, completely full, like I really pigged out.

And then I realized IT WAS MY BAND. DOING ITS JOB. Which was all the more exciting because I didn't at the same time get sick or slime or PB or anything. I didn't even get that awful feeling at the far back of my throat.

IT'S WORKING. IT'S WORKING!!

That Can't Be Right. Can It?

Just back from a few days of hiking and, um, experiencing wilderness. We were so busy keeping the kids busy, covering them in bug spray, bathing them to get the bus spray off and cooking for them (and then of course finding an Urgent Care clinic for my middle child because what would a vacation be without searching for a doctor in a foreign land? ). I felt like I barely ate a thing. And I hiked! Two decent hikes!

And I came home and I weigh exactly what I weighed when we left.

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Amy from Babbles, happy to send you the shirts you claimed in the previous post but I need your mailing address. Can you please send it to catchytitlehereblog (at) gmail?

Clothes for the Sisterhood

Happy Friday!

I have a few things for the sisterhood. First person to call something gets it, and if you let me know today I'll mail stuff out tomorrow. If you let me know after tomorrow morning, it'll go out on Friday.

1. Black semi-dressy v-neck short-sleeve jersey material shirt. I wore it out to dinner with black pants a lot. Size 2X.


2. Hot pink Polo-style Ralph Lauren pique cotton shirt with bright orange collar. Size 2X.


3. Pink Polo-style Ralph Lauren pique cotton shirt. Size 2X.


4. Pink dotted jersey short-sleeve scoop neck with pink rosettes on the neckline. Size 1X. I've worn it just a couple times.


5. Khaki colored Charter Club linen pants, full-length, worn twice. Size 20W.


6. White linen cropped pants. Jones New York size 18W, never worn. I couldn't get a great shot of them but they're really nice. Tags still on 'em.


You can claim something in comments and email me your mailing address at catchytitlehereblog {at} gmail dot com

FINALLY!

This morning I got on the scale and it said 210. Then I went about my day and hopped on again at 8 pm and it said 208.8 - my lowest post-surgery number. Guess which one I'm entering in my spreadsheet?

I am so relieved to see 208.8 again, and I will be even more relieved when I break through and keep moving downward. It's been almost a month of bouncing around with no real losses, and I'm over it. Over. It.

The last few days have been so busy that I haven't had time to eat much, and today was the same. So I'm hoping the scale will be benevolent tomorrow despite the olives I had with dinner. Dare to dream, right?

Side note: Had a business lunch at an Asian place today. I had checked out the menu and figured sashimi would be safe because it doesn't have rice and would be easy to get down.

People, sashimi is literally just sliced chunks of raw fish. I guess I should have known this, especially since I fancy myself quite sophisticated, having lived in New York for three years. Really, though - chunks of raw fish with some ginger and the green spicy stuff on the side.

FYI, it does go down easy with the band.

I'm Hungry. Or Snacky. Or Something.

The scale is stubbornly sticking within a four-pound range above my most recent low.

Listen, kids, it got so bad that yesterday I exercised. Not crazy, sweating-like-a-pig exercise, but a brisk walk. Which clearly means I've gotten desperate.

I'm hungry, thinking about my next meal a lot. I can't blame it on hormones or any particular stress, so I guess it means I need a fill? I still think I'll wait till after Labor Day. We have so much traveling between now and then, to places that aren't likely to have a fill (or UNfill) doctor nearby, that I guess I'm OK with just sticking it out and trying to eat well in the meantime.

In other news, I think I've mentioned this before but it bears repeating: Despite the fill-or-no-fill, when am I going to lose more weight, ohmigod I just threw up again moments... I love this band. I have a different outlook on my life since getting it. My constant mental battle with myself over my weight and my lack of discipline, all of that stuff, is almost entirely gone. I feel at peace with myself in a way that I can't remember feeling in a long, long time.

So I resolve to be patient. The weight will move. I am actively working on it but not letting it consume my life.

Isn't that a nice change?

Catching Up

Today is the last day of the Summer Meltdown Challenge. Confession: Despite the record heat, there wasn't much melting here. I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing wrong. For a while there I had a big chocolate thing going on, but that has subsided. I've cut back on wine. I eat very little meat. I guess I'm just still eating too much of the things I do eat. Gilly has mentioned on several occasions that she's terrified of stretching her pouch. I think I need some of Gilly's fear. Or Joey's workout prowess. Or something. A little discipline goes a long way, Kristin.

My surgeon told me to come see him after Labor Day, and I guess I'll be ready for a small fill then.

Also, I've been terrible at commenting on your blogs lately. I'm reading, although last week was intermittent with the family and puppies visiting. But I'm trying to get back into gear and be more engaged with the band babes.

In other, more positive news, I wore my Banana Republic sweater set to dinner with the Hubs on Friday night. Sorry about the weird lighting.

And, finally, our two adorable furry little houseguests went back to Guiding Eyes for the Blind on Friday. We loved having them here, despite the workload and alarming depletion of newspapers from our recycle bin.

Godspeed, Sheldon and Saffron!