Chaos Reigns

We're in the midst of a fun and completely exhausting visit with my parents, sister-in-law, nephew and two nieces. So we've got six kids under the age of eight to feed, entertain and tire out. Total chaos.

A typical scene: We're trying to get dinner on the table, two kids fight over the Nintendo DS, the two-year-old is covering her entire body with Band-Aids she found in the pantry, the four-year-old is playing with the water cooler and the baby is crying because she wants someone to hold her.

Everyone's displaced from their usual beds, so no one is sleeping well. Last night I ran into my sister-in-law at 3 am while my 5-year-old was having a conniption about his pajamas and she was bringing her two-year-old back to bed after discovering her wandering the halls.

We keep reminding each other that we're making memories for the kids. I better be really skinny after this visit.

The chaos intensifies tomorrow with the arrival of two six-week-old Labrador Retriever puppies. Weeks ago I signed us up to do volunteer "home socialization" visits for a local guide dog organization. The pups come for three or four nights to get used to being around lots of different people in different environments. At the time I volunteered for this week we weren't expecting visitors. Should be interesting.

In band news, I'm too busy to eat much but the scale isn't really working with me.

My Boggle Problem

I downloaded Boggle for iPhone yesterday because I heard it was awesome. It is.

I'm having trouble focusing on much else. Such as the several calls I need to make to square away some insurance and medical billing issues, and other important household tasks.

I wouldn't say I'm at an intervention point, but I can certainly understand how *other* people might find this game addicting.

Anyway, enough of that. My band was crazy tight this morning, I had trouble getting my usual Zone bar down so I had some blended turkey and black bean chili for lunch to avoid any unpleasantness. It went down fine, and this afternoon I had some cucumber and the rest of that sinful french onion dip, so I guess solids are OK now. You just never know with this thing.

NSV: My wedding rings are rolling around my fingers a little bit. Not a lot, not all over the place, but once in a while I feel them clink together and it makes me happy. Which is nice because the scale hasn't moved at all. And I'm actually eating decently.

Tomorrow is going to be record-breakingly hot, so I'm not expecting anything much to change over the weekend. But I will forge ahead! Onward and downward.

Also: Brunch for NY Bandsters on Sunday!! Be there.

Band Lessons/Life Lessons

First, thanks for all your notes about my daughter. She's back to her old toddler self. And by that I mean she raised holy hell in Target this morning and I couldn't even run for the exit because I was waiting for a prescription to be filled. That was fun.

In other news:

1. I cannot be trusted around any kind of chip dip. I will inhale it, and I know it is still a bad idea even if I use cucumber slices rather than chips.

2. I still stress eat.

3. I still hormone eat. (You know what I mean.)

4. If you loll about and wait for the band to do all the work, you stay fat.

Big exhale. I know I said I'd post photos of flowy blue skirt and Banana Republic fitting room, and now I will.

Upon further review, I think I look shlumpy in this skirt. Or at least in the outfit as a whole:

Here's the Banana Republic sweater set:

I think it's best to hold off on this for another 10-15 pounds (and if you don't believe me, check out the side view below).

When I do bust out my BR outfit, I'll button a few middle buttons but leave the top and bottom few unbuttoned. Is that what the kids are doing these days? I am so fashion challenged.

And now, I have to go get my nails done do some errands.

All Good on the Home Front

My baby's surgery went really well this morning (though I think she'd beg to differ). We're home already, she seems to be feeling almost back to normal and I'm incredibly grateful that this was as simple as we had hoped. Thanks for your kind words and thoughts, they did help.

(I'm particularly grateful to the awesome pediatric nurses who, upon hearing what my daughter's favorite song is, immediately burst into "Beat It," despite the fact that it's a ditty about gang violence sung by a pedophile.)

My weight... HOLY COW, people. 213.8 this morning, up two and a half pounds from yesterday and FIVE pounds from my recent low. But I know I didn't eat badly yesterday and my period is due any minute now, so I can't get too worked up about it. This too will pass.

Stop. Stop! STOP!!

Learning when to stop eating is not coming easily to me. This is primarily a problem at dinnertime, but occasionally it pops up at lunch too. (Breakfast is a portion-controlled Zone bar.)

I've never had a vomiting episode from not stopping in time - getting sick for me is always a result of eating a cracker or something that was too dry, not chewing enough and eating too quickly. I've had a tummy ache once or twice from eating too much, but otherwise the only consequence has been slow or no weight loss.

Both nights this weekend I had social events, dinner with friends on Saturday and book club on Sunday. On Saturday I felt like I ate a LOT, although in retrospect, I gave half of my appetizer to my husband and only ate half my fish. But I did finish the completely amazingly fabulous side of mashed potatoes. And a couple bites of dessert (one dessert split among four people). MUCH better than pre-band, but not exactly weightloss friendly. Accordingly, my weight is up a bit the last few days.

This afternoon I got sick from a couple of crackers. Blah. Not sure if the tightness is the result of a hormonal shift or stress. My baby is having minor surgery on Wednesday morning which itself isn't a big deal, but the general anesthesia makes me nervous. And this morning lightning struck some power lines, which fell across our driveway, causing a(nother) power outage. Then I couldn't get in my driveway to get the baby for her pre-op appointment (she was home with the sitter while I did morning errands). So I had to park at my mother-in-law's house and walk through drenching rain across the back yards to carry her back to my car and go to the doctor's office. What a morning.

In happy news, I BOUGHT CLOTHES AT BANANA REPUBLIC ON FRIDAY! This is totally cool for me. It was a sweater set thing, and I don't think I'd wear it just yet but in 10 or 15 pounds it'll look great. I have photos that I'll post soon.

I hope you're all well!

Check-Up With My Surgeon

I saw my surgeon today, for the first time in two months (forgot to schedule a June appointment). The visit went well, despite the disappointing news that I only lost eight pounds in two months. Not setting any records over here.

My surgeon was happy with my progress and said he didn't think I need a fill. I don't think so either, I still find myself unable to eat most meat and can't have anything solid other than a Zone bar before noon. No bread, no pasta, no rice. I haven't really tried salad but I don't think I'd be able to have much of it.

So I'm going to keep trucking, keeping track of the days when I could snack all day. If I look at the big picture, it's hormonal more often than not. Which helps keep me from freaking out that the band isn't working.

The last couple of days my appetite really kicked into high gear, as have thoughts of food. I hope that will subside soon. Like, now.

B-I-N-G-...

E.

Hey, nobody's perfect, right?

Shopping & Scale Woes & Meal Ideas

Some of my clothes are getting too big (yay!) so I went shopping on Saturday.

Ladies, I am in between sizes. I'm not an 18W anymore, all of those and my 18s are too big, but the regular size 16 pants I have are too tight. I bought a 14W skirt and it's pretty loose in the waist so I don't know what's going on.

The skirt is a pretty blue silky flowy thing (I'll try to post a picture) and I wore it with a white t-shirt for Date Night with the Hubs. He likes it.

In other news, the scale is up two pounds from my low on Friday. Which is particularly irritating since I had a nasty PB yesterday (on brownie crumbs!) and ate very little and am on liquids now till dinner.

But my fingers are swollen and it's really hot and humid here, so I'm trying to relax and blame water.

Also, my basil plant has gotten ginormous and I need to use it up. I'm making some pesto but I'm not eating any pasta these days. I can drizzle it over tomatoes and mozzarella, but what else should I use it with? Ideas?

Totally Missed My Six Month Anniversary

Just realized July 4th marked six months since my surgery. I *knew* those fireworks were for something awesome.

I've lost something like 56-57 pounds. I had hoped I'd be at 60 pounds down by my six-month anniversary, but I'll happily take what I've got.

I've lost the weight with virtually no exercise. I say this not proudly but matter-of-factly. Imagine where I'd be if I actually burned some calories! This is particularly interesting to me because through my 20s and early 30s I was an avid exerciser, even when my eating wasn't good. Running, kickboxing, swimming, biking - I did them all, frequently. I'm not sure how I fell so far off the wagon with that.

I was leaning against a wall last night updating the Hubs on the day's activities when he interrupted me to say, "You're looking lean!" (I almost jumped him, but I hadn't had dinner yet. Old habits die hard.)

I'm fitting into clothes I haven't worn for years. I still can't walk very well in heels or fancy thongs. Wedges I can sort of maneuver.

I can cross my legs now.

I am below the high weight for beach chairs, even the cheap ones. That doesn't mean I don't get scared sitting on one, but it's a comfort nonetheless.

I'm still mostly avoiding the camera but I see that slowly changing.

Upcoming goals: At 60.5 pounds down I'll be halfway to my ultimate goal, and I am less than 10 pounds from the mythical Onederland.

*** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Also, I've never done it before, but here's Drazil's BYOC:

1. Love or money? High salary or job satisfaction?
Love, hands down, but definitely high salary. I had great job satisfaction, I loved loved loved it. But I could not have supported my family on it, and that scared me.

2. Favorite time of day?
Night.

3. Do you have a will? Did you tell anyone your wish to be kept alive or not?
Yes. We did our wills a few months before we got married, and have updated along the way. We both have living wills, and we are each others' ultimate deciders on that front.

4. Pick one thing you will do next week to aid your health.
I will go to Zumba. Maybe even twice!

5. Whose comment or blog stuck with you this week?
Barbara's comment that I am close to Onederland caught me by surprise. I hadn't thought of it that way - it has always seemed so far off - and it almost literally jolted me when I read her note. In a good way.

Fruit and Veggies

The crazy heat has subsided a little, but it's still ridiculously humid. I hate humidity. It makes me cranky.

Moving on... I want to thank whoever it was who advised me to put the chicken salad in the food processor. Maybe Cindylew? I don't remember, but I did and my lunch is so much more pleasant now. And I used Nicole's recipe (substituting chives for green onions because that's what's in my herb pot) so it's all kinds of power protein. Thanks to both of you!

The scale was down a little bit again today, so things are moving and I am delighted. I really have scaled back my eating, I keep trying to figure out what the difference is and I'm not sure. I still can't comfortably eat much before noon or 1 pm. But I'm going to keep trying to drink - water, Dunkin Donuts iced tea or Starbucks green tea - and maybe even go to the gym again. I still haven't been back since I threw up all over the parking lot and then again in the car. Kind of mortified. But I'd like to go back to Zumba (different place). That was really fun.

I keep reading about some of you eating steak and sandwiches. I haven't tried a single bite of steak since I was banded, although I've been tempted to have a bite of filet mignon. But I don't usually cook filet and I have zero interest in bringing on a PB in a restaurant. So you see the problem.

Of more concern is that I'm not eating a lot of vegetables. I've had a lot of tomato and mozzarella salads for lunch lately, so that helps. I eat avocado, some grapes and berries. And artichokes. Have I mentioned that?

What fruits and vegetables do you like that go down easily for you?

Also, I want to clarify my comment yesterday about capris: I have no plans to wear shorts. I'm just looking for lightweight summer pants. I have a couple pairs that work, but it's harder to find than you'd think.