AP News Alert*

I did not have an artichoke for dinner tonight. (We didn't have any.)

I haven't lost any weight in the last week or so, which probably means it's time to revamp my dinner menu. I had the snackies all day today, and I can't blame it on hormones.

*AP News Alert was the highest, most important category of news coming over the Associated Press wire. As in, "AP NEWS ALERT - SHOTS FIRED AT KENNEDY IN DALLAS."

PS Apparently we need a new boiler. Our current gas-fired Burnham has a crack in the block, and the generous folk at Burnham are offering us a $550 credit toward a new one. Does anyone know about this stuff? Should we do Burnham again, or go with another brand altogether? This is a totally random question, but it's a big ticket item (we got estimates for ~$19,000) and I don't know jack about this stuff so figured it can't hurt to ask.

How Are You Feeling?

This'll be a quickie because the microwave is chirping to let me know that my artichoke is cooked.

I'm noticing that I can eat a little more, although still not much. The good news is, I don't feel very hungry. The weight loss is slow but it's happening, and there's not much bounce. Yay for that - less mental torture.

Today was the Mother's Day Tea in the 4-year-old class at nursery school. Cutest thing ever - it's one of those rare moments of pure parenthood joy. The kids are singing songs about how much they love their moms, so proud to show us around their classroom and serve us cookies.

The teachers had photos of all the kids throughout the year, and there were several from when I read to the class in the fall.

Holy shit. I. Was. HUGE. I'll have to scan and post later. But really -- H U G E.

Word has apparently gotten around the school about my surgery (I haven't really tried to keep it a secret), because the teachers keep whispering about how great I look and then shooting me a meaningful look and saying, "And how are you feeling?"

Picture Post! And Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Yesterday was four months since I got my band. I've lost 31.5 pounds since surgery, and 44.5 pounds total (including pre-op losses).

I've said it before and I'll say it again: I'd love to have lost more by now. But the fact that I've lost this much while still drinking wine and eating cheese, chocolate and olives is really why I got the band. I'm not dieting; I'm living and losing weight along the way.

I am thrilled I got this thing.

I'm at a good restriction now, after being too tight for three or four weeks. I haven't needed my papaya enzymes in at least a week because things aren't getting stuck. I am being really, really careful about what I eat but I really haven't been very hungry either. HOW AWESOME IS THAT?

I snapped a few photos last night when I got home from Cub Scouts. Excuse the bad lighting.


Thanks to Amy W for the hand-on-hip posing tip. FINALLY, I look like a supermodel.



Also, Happy Cinco de Mayo! This used to be one of my favorite holidays. What's not to like about guacamole and margaritas? But the kids don't tolerate tequila well, so my hard-celebrating Cinco de Mayo days are over.

Today is also my sister's third wedding anniversary. I worked my ass off to get in shape for her wedding. I knew hers was the last sibling wedding and the pictures would be around forever, so I worked with a trainer five days a week from January to May. (And then promptly gained back all the weight I had lost, plus got pregnant and added some more.) HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, K&J!

What I'm Eating, and Goals

I'm having my favorite dinner again - it's been showing up on my menu frequently, and I'm losing weight so I'm going with it.

Here's the menu:

- six Kalamata (Greek) olives
- three small slices of brie with fig spread
- one steamed artichoke (in the microwave, in plastic wrap - I know, the chemicals could kill me), leaves dipped in melted butter**
- a glass of red wine (pinot noir)

Have I gone on the Mediterranean diet without realizing it? Apparently. But I loooooove it. I look forward to it every night. And some nights, I can't even finish it.

My restriction is pretty good right now. I find that I have my best eating days when I have a shake in the morning, even though I really don't love them. But it does give me a protein boost to start the day.

Lunch has been a cup of blended black bean soup or chili with a dollop of sour cream. Both are high in fiber and protein.

For a snack I have a Babybel light cheese, a few olives, a teaspoon of hummus or half of an avocado mashed with some kosher salt. (Not all of these in one day, though.)

I try to drink as much water as possible, and usually have two or three glasses of iced tea (black or green) through the day. And I usually have some kind of chocolate - Cadbury Creme Egg or a mini York Peppermint Patty or a handful of M&Ms.

Some nights I have fish. That's it. That pretty much covers what I eat lately.


**I never cooked an artichoke till I moved in with my husband. There are lots of fancy ways to cook them, but we keep it simple.

We rinse the artichoke, cut the stem close to the base, wrap the whole thing in plastic wrap and put in the microwave for eight or nine minutes - more like 12 or 14 minutes if you have more than one.

We pull off the leaves (they should pull off easily; if they don't the artichoke isn't cooked enough), dip them in some melted butter in a teacup, and scrape the "meat" off the base of the leaf with our teeth. Very primitive, like cavemen. Then when we've gotten through most of the leaves we cut off the bottom (avoid any of the hairlike things - they're not good), dice that up and drizzle the leftover melted butter on top. That's the best part of the whole thing. Artichokes are low in calories and high in fiber, and totally delicious!

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

On to topic #2: GOALS

I was playing around with a BMI calculator and started figuring out goals. I'm not quite 5'4" but I count myself as 5'4" for these calculations.

1. At 174 pounds, I will no longer be obese, just plain overweight. Crazy to aspire to that, isn't it? Most people would be mortified to be considered overweight.
2. I want to break through 162, which is the lowest number I've seen on the scale in my adult life (and I saw it a week or so after running a marathon).
3. My ultimate goal is 145 pounds, when I will no longer be considered overweight. That seems a really long way away. I haven't been that weight since I was a teenager.
4. Most weight charts show my "ideal" weight between 117-130. I don't expect I will ever get there. But hey, dare to dream.

Thanks Joey!

Thanks to Joey for her wise recommendation to go vegetarian for our Indian dinner with my husband's partner and his wife. I had an awesome paneer tikka masala (cubes of cottage cheese in a creamy tomato sauce). It was soooo good and all went down perfectly, no problem.

HAPPY FRIDAY!!

The Girls Are Shrinking

I know it happens to everyone, but why can't the girls take my hips with them? And I still have *a lot* of junk in my trunk. That will never fully go away. I don't mind, I just want it to look more J.Lo than Nell Carter.

Scale was down again today -- FORTY FOUR. Yay for that.

Anyway, I got two new bras today. Smaller size. Here's my problem: One side is a C and the other is a D. I can kinda squeeze the D into the C and make it work, but when I put the C into the D it creates creases under my clothes. So I got a C. I'll let you know how it works out.

Showdown with the Surgeon

OK, so it wasn't all that dramatic. And I almost didn't do it because I hate confrontation (though the Hubs might beg to differ). But I thought of all of you, truly, and that made me brave enough to say something. I did it in a nice way, because he really is a nice man and I think he might just be clueless.

So I said, "Listen I was really freaked out when I called you because I couldn't eat solids. When you said, 'well I'm not going to open you up just so you can eat' all I could think was, this isn't what I signed up for."

He stopped for a minute and said, "I hope I wasn't too curt on the phone." I just kind of smiled, like, welllll actually... and then he went on to agree that of course a liquid diet isn't at all what the band is intended for. He just meant that if I was OK having soups and liquids for a few weeks, it'd give me a jumpstart on weight loss and would naturally loosen up as I lost weight.

He was very happy with my weight loss and I'm going back in a month to check in again.

In other news, I am thrilled that Sandra Bullock adopted a baby boy. Good for her.

Greetings, Earthlings!

Did you see that Stephen Hawking said he thinks there are aliens riding around in space ships and it might not be a good idea for us to try to get to know them? He may have a point there.

That's all I have to say about that.

I lost another half pound, bringing me to 42.5 pounds down which is super-dee-dooper but I'd love to kick it up a notch. Of course I'd like to do that while still eating cheese, chocolate and olives. And drinking wine. Oh, and not exercising much. So I guess I should stop bitching about why I'm losing so slowly.

I have an appointment with my surgeon tomorrow. WILL NOT be getting another fill, I think I'm plenty tight right now. Just a checking in kind of appointment, and I will try to offer some constructive criticism about the way he handled things when I asked if I should come in for an unfill a few weeks ago.

We're going to dinner on Thursday with my husband's partner and his wife. I know them both pretty well, they're very nice. We're going to an Indian restaurant and I'm a little worried about what to have - I can't eat much meat these days, potatoes will likely get stuck, there wasn't any soup on the menu. AHHHH. Thought about chicken tikka masala because of the sauce but it's still white meat so I think I'd get stuck. Maybe I'll go vegetarian and get one of those spinach dishes. I didn't see fish options, but maybe they'll have a special? I don't know. I love Indian food, but I'm not sure how this will go.

Also, my hair just looks like crap lately so I'm getting a few inches cut on Friday. Really excited about this - so much so that I may do a VLOG to show it off.

Finally, does anyone have a good recipe for band-friendly turkey chili? If so, please share!

Fashion Show Picture Post

Looking through these photos tells me two things: 1. I finally am feeling comfortable enough to have my picture taken. 2. Need to work on the frozen smile and wooden poses.

Sigh. All in good time, lovies.

I packed three shirts to wear for the rehearsal dinner, and ended up wearing one I hadn't put in the previous fashion show post. What can I tell you, it was a wild card.

Rehearsal dinner outfit:


Please note the thongs that match the shirt. I never do that kind of stuff. I was proud of myself.

The day before I left for the wedding, I took the baby back to the Lord & Taylor sale to spend some time in the shoe department. She had the time of her life licking playing with the mirrors and eating all the paper inserts that come in the shoe boxes, and I tried on a gazillion pairs of shoes.

I got these for the wedding/summer events:


I sadly report that my hair never made it out of the ponytail in Florida. It was hot and a little humid and, well, I was too damn lazy to put the time and energy that would have been required to tame my hair into something respectable for an outdoor wedding. So I went with the pony. Not an awesome look, but there you have it.

The dress I ended up wearing was a last-minute find. I realize my posts this week make me look like a complete shopaholic but please believe me when I tell you I almost *never* shop. I buy from Lands End or Lane Bryant online whenever possible, I wear shoes until the soles are long gone, my sons keep telling me my shirts have holes in them. You get the picture. The dress I had planned to wear is 10 years old. I bought it for my engagement party, and I've worn it to almost every wedding or engagement party I've attended since.

But I saw this dress and it was on sale at Bloomingdale's in Florida, and the colors were perfect for a Florida garden wedding. Oh, and it was a 16W!


It's time to work on the upper arms. And I really need to get my glasses straightened.


So there you have it. Thanks for all the advice, it was fun hearing your opinions on everything.

Pre-Eating Anxiety

What a great weekend! Relaxing, fun, time with old friends and the Hubs... what more could a girl want?

Not a great eating weekend, though. For one thing, I WAS HUNGRY. And for some reason, I really wanted to binge. I was a little sad/stressed on Friday after we checked into the hotel. Alex had a bunch of conference calls, so I went to walk around a mall nearby. I hadn't eaten lunch and when I hit that food court, let me tell you, I WANTED IT ALL. Luckily, my band saved me from doing serious damage, so I had a bowl of soup from Panera. Then I kind of went off the deep end and had one of those "cookie sandwiches" from Mrs. Fields. Ever seen one? Two chocolate chip cookies sandwiched together with an obscene amount of frosting in between. A jillion calories, easily.

The only saving grace here was that on Saturday we went to EPCOT and walked for four hours in 85-degree heat before the wedding. Thank God, I think that helped things because at least I was on the move and hopefully it cut down on the number of calories my body absorbed from that damn cookie sandwich.

Here's what I'm noticing lately: I get a strange anxiety before I eat, because I know I won't be able to eat much. It's kind of a mix of serious irritation and anxiety. I WANT to eat a lot; I know I probably won't be able to. It's frustrating and kind of perplexing. I hope it will dissipate as I get more accustomed to this new life with abbreviated meals.

I'll do a picture post sometime tomorrow with outfits from the wedding. It all worked out well, and I was happy with the clothes. Which doesn't happen very often...

Also:
1. Didn't have any problem eating on the plane. Alas, JetBlue's Doritos Munchy Mix goes down like buttah.
2. Had my first Corona since being banded. No problem at all, didn't feel funny going down or anything.
3. I noticed a real uptick in my confidence, particularly being dressed up. I'll talk more about that in the photo post tomorrow.
4. Scale says I'm up 2 pounds. Maybe some is from flying? I don't think so, though. I ate a lot of crap. Not a good Swimsuit Challenge Week for me.

**UPDATE** Just had the most horrible PB I've ever experienced. I've been eating and eating and EATING today, attributed it mostly to hormones. But my band finally said enough and I threw up. Violently. Three times. Not much of substance came up, and I wasn't nauseated before it happened, so I'm sure it's band-related rather than food poisoning or something.